Sunday, April 19, 2009


Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend to Husband and noticed a distinct
slowdown in overall system performance -- particularly in the flower and
jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend.

In addition, Husband uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance and Personal Attention and then installed undesirable programs
such as Super 14; Fishing; Football and Golf Clubs.

Conversation no longer runs, and Housecleaning simply crashes the
I've tried running Nagging to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed, Desperate

Dear Desperate,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend is an Entertainment Package, while Husband
is an Operating System.

Please enter the command: 'http: I Thought You Loved Me.html' and try to
download Tears and don't forget to install the Guilt update. If that
application works as designed, Husband should then automatically run the
applications Jewellery and Flowers.

But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband to
default to Grumpy Silence, Happy Hour or Beer.
Beer is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law (it runs a virus in the
background that will eventually seize control of all your system
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend program.. These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband.

In summary, Husband is a great system, but it does have limited memory
and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
additional software to improve memory and performance.

We recommend Food and Hot Lingerie..

Good Luck,
Technical Support

***** keh keh keh, I Like it when everything sounds so technical! heh heh


Ian said...

Very funny.

The Aminos said...

Hahaha, I am the operating system too, not the entertainment package anymore.